Welcome back to high school

I get attacks. Everyone wants to call them panic attacks, which I resent. I'm not paniced - in fact on many occasions I've felt an uncanny calm.

However, I do have pains in my chest, my heart pounds, and I often sweat and feel like I'm going to pass out. Then, at times, I enter a "final" stage in the whole process that I would call a panic attack where there's definitely some fight-or-flight going on.

Had an attack about an hour ago at the Dr.'s office with my little girl. I broke out in a sweat, my stomach cramped, and i would have sworn that I was going to pass out. This is actually no big deal and happens to me all the time, in fact I didn't even mention it when the Dr. came in. Pretty much just my life at this point, no use whining.

No one wants to hear about it anymore. I suppose I'm a bit like an old person complaining that their bowels won't move or something.

I get it -been through this before.

When I was in high school, I hurt my knee part way through my junior football season. Not only was the pain intense, but I couldn't get the crazy thing to work anymore. I went to the trainer, who told me to ice it. All I heard from the coaches as my play quality deteriorated were phrases involving "goddamit" and "head out of your ass". When I finally went to a sports Dr. after the season, he marvelled that I could still walk on it.

I want to be clear - this is no one's fault. I did the best I could do, and the people who were charged with my care / coaching did the best they new. Sh*t happens. However, I learned a very important lesson from all this:

It's a "you're my guy until you get hurt of I find someone better" world. Unfortunatley, due to my little attacks, I'm playing hurt. But I'm still playing. I'm not sitting on the bench nursing this thing - I'm drugging up and bringin' the pain! Or, to be less metaphorical, I'm not curling up in a ball and wishing quietly for death, I'm using self-hypnosis, taking low doases of drugs designed to prevent such attacks, and continuing with a life in which the demands are seemingly endless and often overwhelming.

You'd think that, for all of that, I could warrant the occasional disengenuous "wow - that must suck. I'm impressed that you get throug hit so well without loosing your d*mned mind."

You'd think...

Deadly nightshade - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

Deadly nightshade - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
This is precicely the sort of thing that makes me wonder what sort of person used to become a witch. Were they disappointed when they realized that they were only high, and not in fact flying? Or were they like "Cool - give me more..."

My girls

So, a friend calls me last night at about 10:00 asking me if I'd like to play base in a concert tonight. What the hell, says I. Why wouldn't I want to play an instrument I don't play on songs i don't know in a band I'm not in. Sweeeeeeeeet......


The most wonderful part of the whole night was the picture my little girl made for me. Check this out...

I can't think of anything that makes me happier than my family. My wife and my daughters make me hope there is a God, and that somehow we'll be together forever.

PvPonline.com � Hosted By SPEAKEASY.NET

PvPonline.com � Hosted By SPEAKEASY.NET
Articles like this are why I love Scott Kurtz and PVP Online. Scott is SO right-on. My kids would play games all day every day if I would let them. And if they weren't doing that they would watch cartoon network. And if they weren't doing that... And if they weren't doing that, they MIGHT go outside.

Fortunately, I have joined the country club and take my kids swimming for about two hours a day. Unfortunately, i think this is the only excersize they get.

It's no coincidence that all of my friends developed weight problems at about the same time we got our vic-20s and Atari consoles.

Penny Arcade! - Do You Hear What I Hear

Penny Arcade! - Do You Hear What I Hear

Someday, airlines are going to figure out the stark terror that they invoke, and they're going to just start injecting passengers with Morphine at the door or something. I'd pay an upgrade fee for that, baby.
I know more people with prescriptions for zanex or whatever just for this reason ...

Extended Dynamic problem when using jt400 with db2 for i5 (db2/400)

Was getting this problem. Set classloader to single, then disabled extended dynamic support and resolved.

Computing.Net - A batch file for rename

Computing.Net - A batch file for rename
You can do a substring in a batch file in the following way:
echo %filename:~3,9% - this will echo the variable filename starting at character 3 and going through character 9

This can be combined with the for /f command or a utility like fart.exe to do some really neat stuff :)